Confessions of a Feelings Driven Journal Writer

The other day I decided to look over some old journal entries (since 2005).  After reading a couple I decided to start analyzing them methodically; like any engineering mind would do, right?  So I took out a piece of paper and started to chart the themes, ideas and content of the entries.  I guess this is what happens when you mix an analytical mind with a desire to journal.  It was very interesting to look back and see what thoughts and feelings consumed my mind at a specific time.

There are probably a half dozen partially filled notebooks on my shelf or in boxes containing entries.  I think I started to journal back in February of 2003 and writing in them as always been sporadic, kind of like my blogging… As I digress, it’s funny to see how silly I was even a couple years ago and how a lot of the entries focused on extremes.  Most of the time I would only write if I felt my spiritual state was either very good or very bad, there really wasn’t much in between except for about 15% of the other entries.  I guess you could have called me a feelings driven journal writer.

Now, don’t label me as one of those anti-feeling Christians, but looking back on the entries, feelings where a huge factor in guiding my thoughts and actions.  One problem I noticed after some reflection was I would confuse bad feelings for good feelings, or worldly and fleshly feelings for godly feelings.  It was easy to rely on these feelings with out checking to be sure they were good or God honoring.

Anyway, I don’t what to get too much into ‘feelings,’ but it reminded me of the need to test everything, including feelings.  Just because something ‘feels’ good doesn’t mean it is good.  The world, our flesh and Satan are on the attack waging war on us, which also includes our feelings.  This makes it all the more important bring our feelings before the Lord and His word, the standard of truth, to guide our feelings and thoughts.

PS:  If you’re looking for some entertainment let me know and we can have a “Journal reading with Adam” night!